


Guilt, Gifts and redecorationg

by Elyon5



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Baking, Decorating, Friendship, Gift, Gifts, Guilt, Lamp - Freeform, Logan - Freeform, Panic, Patton - Freeform, Prinxiety - Freeform, Redecorating, logicallity - Freeform, roman - Freeform, room, virgil - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-18
Updated: 2019-06-18
Packaged: 2020-05-14 09:20:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19270342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elyon5/pseuds/Elyon5
Summary: Roman & Virgil and Logan & Patton all try to help each other but ends up receiving the help they did not know they needed.It's cute, fluffy and hopefully a bit fun!If its friendship or more is up to you. (or up to me if I manage to do a part 2)Its a bit dramatic and I cant write anything without spoiling the story.Why not just give it a shot?!I'll try to give you a refund if its bad. ^^ < 3





	1. Chapter one - something wicked this way comes

**Author's Note:**

> I got this idea simply because Patton said “…whenever I come here” in "moving on"…. Are they not always there? It made me think that maybe the sides “rooms” aren’t their actual rooms; more like emotional storage of Thomas life. It’s all memories (literally for Patton). Only thing contradicting this is Virgil. We’ve seen his room more and more. So my brain did a thing and this is it. Just speculations brought together in a dramatic and fluffy story. I decided to finish the whole thing before posting anything cause I tend to procrastinate and disappoint…which I did.. Anyhow. This story is complete. So enjoy. :)
> 
> It’ll come clear in chapter two what I’m rambling about. ^^

\-----

 

The lights suddenly flickered in the room and the weird feeling Virgil had been experiencing for a few minutes now grew stronger. Patton seems oblivious as he continued talking, putting the finishing touches on Virgils nails before expectantly looking up at Virgil. They were both in their pajamas sitting on the rug in front of the couch of the living room. Virgil smiled weakly as he realized he had zoned out for the past 5 minutes and had no idea what Pat had been talking about. Something about baking earlier today? Roman.. And hats? Or did he say cats? Probably cats? What did cats have to do with baking anyway? He cracked his neck as he discreetly scanned the room for any cat-shaped cookies.

“Hm” He tried sounding neutral for Pat to continue talking.

“Yeah?” Patton asked in a neutral tone.

SHIT!  
Should he say yes? Come clean? Keep pretending? But what if he was saying yes to something bad. Did Roman say something bad about Pattons cookies and now Patton was asking if he agreed with Romans harsh comment? There was a hint of concern and guilt in Pattons eyes making it impossible for Virgil to simply say that he had zooned out of the conversation.  
Would Roman really do that though? Downplay someone else’s creativity? Wait… Did Patton even talk about baking? He couldn’t remember. He was such a bad friend not paying attention. Saying yes seemed like an easy choice; agreeing with…Patton? But what if Pat caught him in the lie. Patton valued honesty. He would hate Virgil for lying to him but if he told the truth after this long silence Patton would know for sure hehadn’tbeenpayingattention. Howlonghadpassed? WouldPatgetupset! Or sad! Or mad!

Patton gave a small chuckle and smiled.

SHIT!

Virgil gasped for air realizing it had literally been no more than 2 seconds and Pat quickly interrupted his thoughts with a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“I’m sorry kiddo” he smiled kindly, “Just breathe, please! It’s ok Storm Cloud, that was mean of me. I noticed your thoughts drifting so I just kept rambling hoping to calm you down. Are you ok? Don’t want you “striking” me down.” I giggled at his own joke. “get it? Stormy” he smiled.  
Ever since the puppet video Pat had been trying to give him less cute nicknames. It was still a work in progress, but Virgil appreciated the effort. And the puns helped. It meant that opening up, however scary, was still worth the effort. That his feelings mattered.

“I’m sorry Pat” he answered sheepishly.

Another barely audible rumble sounded through and chills ran like waves up over Virgils arms and connected through his shoulder blades. He quickly pulled down his sleeves over his hands. Pat retracted his hand. Usually Virge would appreciate Patton remembering to respect his personal bubble from time to time, but right now he felt like he could use some grounding.

“Did you hear that?” he asked looking around when the lights flickered again.

“Hear what?” Patton asked.  
“That …rumble?” Patton looked quizzically back as a response “..the lights?” Virge urged.

“Oh, too bright? You want me to turn them down kiddo?”

Patton went to stand but Virgil grabbed the hem of his shirt. Patton halted looking down cheerful but concerned. The lights flickered a third time. However when Pat made no sign of noticing the change in the room he let his hand drop. The weird feeling spread to Virgils stomach. Thomas wasn’t anxious. In fact, reaching out he could feel Thomas resting peacefully. Sure he was sleeping on the couch, not optimal, but there were no nightmares in the dreamscape. Not that he could detect. So why was Virgil feeling this way.

“It’s no problem really.” Pat comforted “How about I turn of the lights and we put on some Netflix to distract ourselves a bit? And you can tell me what’s wrong when you’re ready... But only if you want to” he quickly added.

A crash echoed abnormally loud from upstairs. Making Virgils knees prickle uncomfortably. The feeling in his chest grew uncontrollably. This wasn’t a normal panic attack. There really wasn’t anything to panic about. Patton turned and bounced away calmly as the lights flickered again.

“Something’s wrong. I…I have to go” He managed to mumble out.

Before Virgil sank down he saw Patton turn quickly towards him, smile fading.

 

\-----

 

“I…I have to go”

“Virge wait…”

Patton let his outstretched arm fall to his side. He was already gone. Did he hear that right? Virgils voice was low but had it not sounded a bit distorted? He could not just leave Virge like that. Something was wrong!  
Virgil had started to confide in him more, said he would come to him if something was bothering him. But now he’d just.. left, maybe he needed a moment?... Oh, maybe he shouldn’t have joked like that with him. Rambling on like that and then basically asking if Virge agreed. That would give anyone an uncomfortable feeling. What if his dark son felt betrayed?  
‘I have to apologize!’ Patton thought as he rushed towards the stairs, but on the second step a grip snaked around his wrist, forcing him to stumble to a stop.

 

\-----

 

Virgil eyed the vastness of his room carefully as he appeared (trying to place the look of concern and disappointment Patton had given him out of his mind.)  
He had appeared directly into the deepest place in his mindspace on purpose. Nothing could come in here without his or Thomas consent. If Thomas had unknowingly opened up his inner room to nightmares, then that could lead to some serious trauma; phobias or worse.  
Virgil wasn’t Thomas fear but rather his caution of fearful things. It was Virgils responsibility to protect this room so Thomas would not end up emotionally scarred.

Suddenly there was another rumble and some weak distorted moaning from outside. Virgil signed heavily. It seemed another nightmare had seeped into his room. It did not happen too often anymore. Thomas was a hopeful creative person to the core, much thanks to Patton and Roman. And where they failed; Logan would make reasonings to a point that could dissolve any nightmare who dare intrude. But every once in a while a nightmare that had hid out in the dreamspace for too long would grow powerful enough to creep into one the sides rooms… But Virgil could usually sense them.

You’d think being the embodiment of anxiety would make engaging such a thing impossible, however Virgil had grown stronger since he bonded with the other sides. He had also found that the three best ways to deal with these nightmares were to:  
A – Ignore it long enough and it would go away. (nightmares lived to scare after all)  
That option did not seem to work here. So…  
B - Go out and stare at it until it felt uncomfortably numb and would go away.  
It usually worked since Virgil was stronger than most nightmares. Virgil hated option B since it made him feel awful and weakened afterwards.

This time however he assumed the nightmare on the other side to be more physical and less of a shadow since it made so much noise.

As to prove his point Virgil heard another splintering crash, a sharp short yell, a bump and then the sound of sliding before another weak bump. .. Did the nightmare just slide down to sit down? That was new. Nightmares did not tire or feel pain. Virgil felt the sharp unease grow again. Whatever was in there was affecting him a lot. Hopefully his room was affecting it back.  
Which left Virge with option C! Or option Roman as he secretly liked to think of it since it was drastic and dumb. Virgil grabbed the door handle with one hand and summoned a crude crossbow in his other. The nightmare was definitely downstairs. He just.. had to open the door, get down there and scare it to oblivion while it was still calm.

Virgils heart was pounding uncomfortably making breathing a chore. Dark feelings of unease kept creeping into him. They were very real and yet they seemed… weird. They were not “new feelings” per say but they FELT new, different. Like he was experiencing then for the first time. They did not belong to him.  
He opened the door quickly shutting it behind him.

 

\-----

 

Patton just managed to catch himself before he face planted on the stairs.

“Oh… I… Let me help you. I’m terribly sorry about that Patton” Logan clumsily moved around the stairs in order to try and help Patton up. 

“Logan?” Patton blinked and looked himself over. That hand on his wrist had startled him enough to trip on the stairs and fall over but nothing seemed broken. “Where did you come from? I need to find Virgil and tell him I’m sorry.”

“Well I.. I was here ..reading… before you and Virgil got here.”

When Patton did not answer or accept his outreached hand Logan unconsciously held it close to his chest absentmindedly nursing it with his other hand for a second before neutralizing his body language again. Logan casually gestured over towards his large rotating armchair by the side of the kitchen. He wore a very rare awkward look. As if he had done something wrong.

“Wha… You’ve been here for hours and you didn’t say anything?” Patton gasped putting his hands in front of his mouth.

“I didn’t mean to intrude. The two of you seemed….” Logan trailed of, searching for the right words “content.. and occupied. Anyhow I was engulfed in reading... As to why I stopped you just now I… I’m not sure but I was observing or, well not that I was eavesdropping I just… ” Logan cleared his throat and started over “I just caught my name in your rambling.” Patton who had been staring, seemingly paying attention to every word Logan spoke now looked around blushing.  
“Something about Roman making tiny hats for the 12 cats who, apparently without my knowledge, have been summoned into MY room.”

Patton sniggered. Logan looked so distraught and Patton felt kind of bad. The logical side had trouble picking up sarcasm and probably didn’t know if there were actually 12 cats in tiny hats waiting for him in his room or not.

“It’s okay Teach! There are no actual kittens. Promise. Nor any tiny hats.”  
Logan relaxed his shoulders and looked more at ease.

“That is not my name. ..But I must say I am still sorry for prying Patton. My apologies!”  
“It’s really no problem, I can’t believe I didn’t notice you were here all along. You should have joined us Lo! …LO’gan!” Patton corrected himself as he noticed Logan raising an eyebrow at the new nickname. “We would never mind the extra company.”

“That is all well and good Patton” Logan said “but this still leaves me confused. It would appear Virgil was distracted long before your question. I must conclude he did not run away because of you but rather something else. So I don’t see why you seem so upset and in need to apologize? To me it seems Virgil would have left regardless since he was not comfortable here. It might be wise to simply allow Virgil a moment to sort himself out.” Logan hesitated and added “Not that he wasn’t comfortable being around YOU. It seemed more like he had.. other obligations?… Although, this is not my area of expertise. Feelings…”

“Logan!”

“No Patton, I know. I have been cold and distant. And you have no reason to take my advice in this particular matter.”

Patton gave a huffing sigh and Logan could only describe the look he got as a parental disapproving one.

“I know …that..” The words seemed unusually hard for Logan. He avoided eye contact and seemed to use gestures to help push the words out. “…I am… not…always Right! Or easy to deal with.”

Patton softened his gaze and reached out to grab Logans hand. It seemed to startle the side but he accepted and finally got to help the moral side to his feet.

 

\-----

 

Slowly descending his stairs Virgil caught the sound of rapid breathing. Another wave hit him and made him almost nauseous. Just what was in his room? Maybe he should go get the other sides.  
The memory of Pattons sad face flashed before his eyes.  
No! He could do this alone. He can protect the ones he…

A whimper cut his trail of though. He jumped the last few steps before he could change his mind and rushed to the source of the noise just behind the couch, crossbow outstretched. The deep breath he had drawn in preparation to let out as a menacing scream died before it left his lips.  
Virgil deflated, and the bow vanished from his grip as he fell to his knees in front of the white clad man hunched together on the floor.

He was pale, shaking, eyes dark and wide with fear. He seemed to be clutching his chest. The fear, anxiety and pain Roman felt was once again transferred to Virgil causing him to shake and stiffen from the chills creeping up his legs. This made sense. It’s why he was feeling so affected. 

“ROMAN?!! I told you it’s too risky for you to be in here. Remember last time..” The words came out fast, distorted and vicious.  
Roman visibly curled in on himself. Virgil stopped talking.  
Although Virgil would forever remember the time Thomas and the sides came to search for him and convince him of his worth as one of Thomas sides with fondness, he also remembered how hard the room had affected the other sides along with himself. The side in front of him was barely recognizable as the creative side. With one hand gently placed on Romans knee Virgil did a double take just to make sure it was really the creative side and not a nightmare dressed up as him before reaching for Romans face to try and get his attention. Roman flinched and Virgil instinctively retracted his hands.

“Virgil?” Romans voice was weak.

“Yeah, it’s me.”  
Virgil hesitated again from how distorted his voice had become.

“Come on Prince. We need to get you out of here.”  
He could not help but cringe at the involuntary menace in his own tone.  
“You’ll feel better I promise” He continued trying to get the creative side on his feet.  
Roman noticeably pulled back eyeing him suspiciously. Virgil quickly stood and took a step back when a glimmer caught his eye. Roman had summoned his sword. Still on the ground but clasped tightly in his hand. Romans eyes still had darkness underneath but somehow it did not surprise Virgil that the creative side would pick Fight over Flight any day. Even in the state he was in.

“Princey” He tried slowly but Romans eyes only grew darker.

Roman lashed out awkwardly from his sitting position. The blade just barely missed Virgils face.  
‘Think Virge, think! How do I make this dork trust me?’

Looking down at the creative side, the answer came to Virgil easier than expected. As Roman shifted, tensing his muscles Virgil bent, against better judgement, forward into Romans reach.

“Do you trust me?”

The defensive features on Romans face fell into confusion and his second attack was left hanging.  
“w…what?...wait. Virge?”

Roman relaxed and let his sword follow gravity and vanish as Virgil let out a relaxed sigh. Another nervous wave from Roman hit him, causing the anxious side to slowly reach out his hand towards Roman.

“Do you trust me?”

There was still distortion in his voice but he focused on forcing a Aladdin-worthy shy smile hoping deeply Roman would accept and not fight for once in his life. ‘By the power of Disney, please just take my hand’, he though. Roman gave a weak cheeky smile.

“…yes”

As soon as their hands touched, Virgil grabbed on tightly and speeded them up the stairs towards his inner room. It was risky, but he could not take Roman into the rest of the mindscape like this. That might actually give Thomas real nightmares or worse. They could go out to Thomas himself but there was a strong possibility Roman would not be able to follow him as he was now.  
No, he could deal with Roman himself.  
He could do this!  
He could protect Thomas!  
…He had to.

 

\-----


	2. Chapter two - trying to stand on two feet

\-----

The logical and moral side had relocated themselves to the kitchen. Logan had suggested Patton finish one task before going to find Virgil. On that note Patton had insisted they should do some baking together. Patton was laughing. Logan on the other hand was utterly frustrated. He could not grasp why Patton would not simply follow the recipe.

“I do not understand. What is the point of these measurements if you are not going to read and assemble them as instructed?” He stated setting the cookbook down.  
Patton put the bowl of dry ingredients to the side and just smiled as he put a comforting hand on Logans shoulder.

“Lolo..Looogan” he corrected himself ” think of them more like guidelines. Some of them are important, yes, but you need to break some eggs to make an omelet.”

“Patton I am not entirely convinced that is the correct usage of that phrase. Also, there are no eggs in this recipe and furthermore how do you know this will turn out as intended when you insist to keep adding new things” Logan lifted a small jar of cinnamon the recipe had not specified for.

“That’s just the thing..” Patton gently took the cinnamon adding a few pinches to the melted chocolate. “..baking should be an adventure. Not knowing is part of the fun!” Logan eyed Patton carefully as he left the melted chocolate turning his attention back to the dry ingredients. “It MIGHT turn out bad BUT it can also get even better.” Patton searched his brain for a bigger word “Improved!” 

“so…It’s like an experiment?”

“YES EXACTLY” Patton jumped and clapped his flour covered hands excitedly, spreading the flour in a big cloud around them “…oh opps!”

Logan coughed once looking completely stunned for a second as the flour settled between them. Logan looked from Pattons hands before looking down at his shoulder where the moral sides hand had previously left a big white handprint on his otherwise perfectly black attire.  
He blinked. The sudden silence urged Patton put his hand back into the flour and boop Logans nose before ducking for cover. 

If anyone ever mentioned this later, Logan would absolutely positively deny it, but without hesitation Logan grabbed a handful of flour running after Patton with a big grin on his face.

 

\-----

 

As they ascended the stairs Roman seemed to second-guess his decision. It wasn’t enough to stop Virgil but Roman was resisting, sending a few more uncomfortable feelings Virgils way. He let out a pained distorted groan but managed to push Roman inside and close the door.  
Roman fell of his own accord and scrambled backwards away to the nearest safe corner; between a crooked bedside table and the bed. Virgil fell to one knee grabbing his head trying to pushing his own discomfort to the side. Virgil had to try and calm Roman as fast as he could so that the anxiety and fear would not manifest inside this room. He could already feel the shadows growing darker.

“This is not how I thought your first visit here would go Ro” He said more to himself than to Roman.

Virgil did not know how to comfort people. Most of the time he had trouble calming himself down. This might have been a bad idea. Once more he thought to go get the others. His flight reflexes were practically begging him to run and get help. But one look at Roman he knew he could not leave, even for a second.  
Virgil scanned the room, calling anything that could be helpful to him. Patton had distracted Roman with an art book. Virgil had one of those, but where?

He crossed the room towards Romans hunched form grabbing a Jack Skellington figurine from a shelf. Roman did not flinch as he kneeled in front of him putting the figurine in Romans shaking hand. Virgil grabbed a dark blue blanket from the bed and threw it over the other sides shoulders.

“I know it is not your color Princey just try to die the death of a fashionista in a graceful manner.” Virgil tried to joke but it only caused Roman to stiffen up.

‘SHIT!’  
Virgil reached up under his pillow and carefully replaced the figurine with Mr Fluffybuttoms instead. Awkwardly patting Romans shoulder as he did so.

“I’m only kidding Ro. You’re safe here.”

Looking Roman over he noticed he was still clutching his chest, knuckles turning white.

“Roman are you hurt?” He heard himself wordily blurt out louder than expected, his voice still distorted.

He grabbed Romans arm before noticing Roman was actually holding a box wrapped in purple paper. Virgil blinked. He then, while stunned, lost his footing and fell backward as Roman pushed him away. The room grew darker. What’s that emotion? ..Guilt? Had Princey come to prank him with something nasty? The emotions weighed hard on Virgil and he found it increasingly hard to motivate himself to move.

“Roman, I don’t care what’s in the box just breathe for me ok” Virgil got back up on his knees inching closer to Roman again. “In for 4, hooold it, 5, 6, 7, and breathe out…slowly Roman slowly.” Virgil mirrored the breathing in slow motions in front of Roman a few times. After a moment he was unsure if he was still doing it for the creative side or for himself. He searched Romans face, he was avoiding Virgil’s gaze.

The light flickered and went out. Usually Virgil would react badly but his focus was now more on Roman than himself to even care about his own emotions and pains. Again answers came easy to him. With a snap of his fingers the fairy lights around his bed light up. Roman breathing halted. Virgil snapped again, and a similar sling of lights lit up around his table. The light, like little stars spread through the room and seemed to vanquish the darkness. Roman seemed to finally catch his breath as the tiny lights reflected in his eyes.

As a mix of various bad feelings hit anxiety again he did the only thing he could think of. He may not be the creative side but he could still create things. He placed his hand above Romans and closed his eyes in concentration.

“Trust me”

He heard Roman catch his creation softly.

He opened his eyes. Roman breathing was almost back to normal and the eyeliner was retreating. Roman blinked. A smile twitched his lips and as he looked up from the object staring back at Virgil face, his eyes still red from distress. The smile slowly broke in to a grin that suddenly let out a rough laugh.

Virgil deadpanned as the laughter continued. However he could not help but slowly relax as Romans anxiety and fear left his own body. Roman might be overreacting out of the chock and adrenaline but he was ok. Virgil sat down more comfortably and moved up to Romans side leaning his head back against the bed waiting for the pain to leave his muscles. He secretly smiled at the now chaotic person next to him. As tears started to form in the creative sides eyes Virgil chose to simply close his eyes and lean his head on Romans shoulder as to not wound the fragile ego of his friend.  


 

\-----

 

They had landed on the floor after a bit of playful wrestling that ended with Logan being forced to drop the last flour to the ground. They both seemed to silently agree that that was quite enough silliness sitting up at the same time. Out of breath giggles still erupted from Patton as he helped Logan up trying to brush the logical side clean of flourdust.  
Logan could not help but ruffle Pattons hair free of some flour too and then carefully brushing the shoulders and back of the others onesie. All while Patton continued to carelessly mess Logans shirt up even worse when trying to get the flour out. Logan gave a loving sigh and abruptly stopped Pattons hands grasping them in his own. Logan opened his mouth to tell the moral side to stop wrinkling his shirt. Patton looked up. His eyes questioning if he had done something wrong. Logan blinked.

“… Lo is fine… If you absolutely feel you must grant me a nickname.” Logan was not sure why his mouth sometimes did these things without his permission to do so.

Somehow it was worth it. If Logan had to describe the look Patton awarded him with it would be ‘star-eyed’. Which of course was ridiculous. No ones eyes had stars in them, unless reflecting actual stars counted. And yet, he could not deny that the description was the most suitable one. A star-eyed expression, impossible to look away from.

Logan felt his face grow hot as he realized he could in fact not look away. He also became awfully aware of the closeness of the other side or how Patton had somehow clasped their fingers together…Or had he done that himself? Thankfully Patton blinked twice, gasped and twirled around back towards the kitchen. Rushing off.

“Oh my goodness, do you smell that? The chocolate is burning!” After a slight pause he added “LOooooO, come help me!”

Looking around at the mess they had created in the living room Logan simply waved a hand to make the flour disappear while walking back to the kitchen. Composing himself and silently trying to analyze all the very out-of-character things he had just done because of Pattons influence.  
His cheeks still hurt from smiling.  
Was it bad? He tried pushing all feelings aside to analyze the situation properly.  
Entering the kitchen he found the Moral side endearingly rushing back and forth through the small kitchen space in a slight panic. Logan smiled and decided it was a problem for another day. Another flick of the wrist and Logan changed from the messy black clothing to his own onesie rolling up his sleeves.

 

\-----

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this story so far.  
> "Boop" *runs away


	3. Chapter 3 - Lights! Drama! Action!

\-----

The laughter died out and through the tears, darkness and fairy lights Roman finally noticed where they were. Every side had a corner of Thomas mind but they also had a more vulnerable deeper space inside said corner. This must be Virgils.

He took a shaky breath and looked wide eye at Virgil. He had trusted Roman enough to take him into the most vulnerable place in the “anxiety-space”. He felt he probably should react with anger towards the other because he just put Thomas at risk.. but instead he couldn’t help but feel impressed. He never knew how hard Virgil could fight. He had always imagined Anxiety as someone who would run at first sight of trouble. Shame filled him once more.

Roman could not help but look down at his hands. He slowly turned them; palms up, palms down. Looking at them still shaking uncontrollably from what he had felt downstairs. What Virgil felt every day no doubt. What Roman had triggered him feel today. The image of Virgil barely avoiding his blade. Virgil falling to his knees, getting pushed back and still crawling towards him came back to him. He made fists in hope of stopping the shivers. What kind of a prince was he?  
He cursed the fact that he for the life of him couldn’t keep his own hands from trembling while Virgil was perfectly still beside him. He looked back up at Virgil. They had moved from their hunched threatened position on their knees to a more relaxed spot leaning against Virgils bed. The other side was still tense but rested his head on Romans shoulder. While he looked relieved he still seemed fearful of Roman. This would not stand. Virgil fixed the mess he had gotten himself into by showing up unannounced. Roman knew he should have left as soon as he realized the emo wasn’t there but as he felt the room affecting him he could not help but to take it as a challenge to his bravery. Virgil had taken a beating just as hard as Romans ego had. Looking down at Virgils creation in his lap he knew there was only one thing for a prince to do…

“By the power of Disney eh?”

Virgil retracted from his shoulder and gave him a shaken blushing expression before pulling his knees towards his chest and fell into himself with a groan. Roman sniggered which caused the anxious side give a louder wailing groan once again but Roman could see Virge’s shoulders visibly relaxing.  
Teasing always worked.

“Jupp, you said that out loud. Very romantic. And then you bring me straight into your bedroom? What’s that about?” Roman was hoping to simply ease the mood but he could not help but tease a little bit more. “Speaking of which, I do ‘TRUST’ you so I’ll show you my ‘sword’ if you show me yours.”

Virgil shoot straight up onto his feet looking down at Roman with horror. Roman could only hold his suggestive facial expression for a moment before laughing again summoning his sword and handing it to Virgil, handle towards the anxious trait.

The other side accepted it slowly in confusion until it dawned on him.

“No?”

“Yes!” Roman exclaimed excitedly leaning forward like a kid at Christmas.

“No!! How? When did you..?...nNO!” Virgil finished sternly

“Come on Virgil’ante, don’t be shy. I already saw it. I just want a closer look”

The anxious side countered Romans hopeful look with an annoyed one for a moment, before in defeat summoning his crossbow.  
“ugh, whatever Sir Fright-Knight..” Virgil sometimes felt like he could live out of Romans offended faces alone, and the face Roman presented at the undignified nickname and the implication that the prince had been scared was priceless. It faded just as quickly at the sight of the weapon.

“Woha, a crossbow?” Roman literally jumped on his feet grabbing the weapon. Virgil did not let go but instead tugged it back.

“buh… but you said you saw it.” He stated in a betrayed tone.

“Muahaha HA” Roman could not help but play the villian. Virgils face however simply fell into an unamused deadpan in response “I only knew you had SOMETHING to attack me with. Could have been a sword could have been a rock, could have been professor Mustard with a rope in the dining room…”

“ha..ha” was Virgils dry response as he let Roman look over the crossbow.  
He casually threw Romans samurai sword flat on his bed where it vanished seconds later and walked over to his desk.

However fascinated Roman was with the crude and crooked crossbow the creative side could not help the guilt he felt seeping in. Just like the crossbow, Virgils room was a shadowy mess. It had no noticeable walls or ceiling. It had been so long he had forgotten how the inner rooms worked. Everyone’s outer room reflected the world around them. For example; Thomas was fast asleep on the couch so every side’s ‘room’ reflected the living room right now.  
The inner room however only held what was brought in. It reflected the side. Being creativity, creating and changing his room came naturally. He first noticed the difference when Patton had let him into his space when Thomas was around 5. It was a light fluffy mess and without thinking Roman had given Patton walls, floor, furniture, lots of pillows and big windows overlooking clouds. Patton had been amazed and had brought Roman back into his space from time to time to “redecorate”. Roman was particularly proud of Patton’s balcony draped in rainbow colored flowers. When Roman thought about it… It was actually a really long time ago now since he had last redecorated. Maybe in Thomas late teens, early twenties.  
The logical side had gotten his room furnished once only in Thomas teenage years after giving Roman a detailed plan. Things had to make sense. Roman was in and out before he knew it. Not even a thank you. However Logan had not once complained about the ceiling window he had snuck in. Roman had even read up so he knew it would be displaying all the stars in their correct alignment. Roman just had to take the ‘no comment’ as the best compliment he would ever get from the logical side.  
This is why looking around the anxious traits space made the guilt rise inside him. They were standing on a floor but there really was no surface to speak of. Only dark space underneath their feet that made your stomach sink if you looked at it for too long. Looking at it now; any time at all was ‘too long’. The room ended in the same way it seemed to keep going for eternity. It felt menacing and empty. He came here to make things right but having felt all the things Virgil would have to live through each day just because of small changes... His silly gift was not enough and changing Virgil’s inner room was definitely not the right thing to do either. Or..?

“Roman!”

Virgil was suddenly in front of him again. It was so dark. Why was he shaking again?

“Can I not leave you alone for one second Drama Prince” The distortion in Virgil’s voice was back but he was smiling kindly taking away the insults impact. “Here!”

Roman accepted what was given to him and the room slowly went back to the way it had been.  
“..and here!” Virgil’s voice was back to normal as he sat down next to the prince again.

Roman did not have to be told twice accepting the pencils and opened up the coloring book to a random page. After a long moments silence he signed and stopped drawing.

“You wanna… you know, talk about it?” Virge asked cautiously. “You don’t have to. I just….I felt…”

His words trailed of. Roman knew what he meant. The guilt.

He handed the gift to Virgil. The anxious trait eyed the purple paper with sad suspicion and then looked back to Roman.

“Its not…I’m sorry… I just….” Roman trailed of.

Unexpectedly fast, Virgil opened up the gift. Halting only when the only thing left was raising the cardboard lid. He gave Roman a quick frightened glance before throwing the lid off, eyes closed. It was such a sad display but Roman could not help but snigger as Virgil relaxed and dramatically opened one eye to look into the box. Distraught he glanced at Roman taking the box firmly into both hands examining it closer. Then almost throwing the box away as well. Roman felt himself grow cold and his face fell watching the box slide across the room.

“I’m aware now it’s not..“ He tried but Virgil had thrown himself over him.

Roman let out a screech and the pencils scattered onto the ‘not-quite-ground’-floorspace.  
“You idiot!”

It took a moment for Roman to realize Virgil was in fact not rightfully strangling him… The anxious emo was hugging him.

“What?.. I….What?”

Virgil sat back, hands covering his face.

“I thought…” Virgil took a moment to compose himself before hitting Roman hard on his shoulder. “It’s just fairy lights right?”

“Oow! Yes!” Roman said offence creeping into his voice and disappearing just as fast “Like I tried to explain; I’m aware now it’s not good eno…”

“You idiot” Virgil cut him off again. “I firkin’ loo… I…I like them, ok?.. Whatever... I thought you were here to…WHAT WAS ALL THE GUILT ABOUT?”  
Roman looked at him in disbelief.

“After all ‘this’, it is clearly not enough of a gift and you.. you already have…” He began to motion towards the small slings of light illuminating the space.

“Have you seen this room Princey? It’s dark and gloomy and it’s not by choice.. I can’t create light.” Virgil still sounded upset but was starting to noticeably relax again. He breathed in deeply and held his breath before letting out a long sigh. ”I can barely create anything…So, you know..”  
Roman unconsciously grabbed the gift Virgil had created to make sure it would not disappear.

“But..” Roman looked to the lights adorning his bedframe and table.  
He had initially thought that was all he could see in the dim room but now it became clear those two strings of light plus the crooked bedside table, the bed and a desk without a chair were the only furniture adorning the vast space. Everything else seemed to be rubble and uneven shapes left in the rooms corners. Perhaps old broken creations.

“A gift…from Pat” Virgil was rubbing his neck “Said it would brighten up my day.”

“Oh”

“They are the only good thing about this room.” He stod and kicked the crooked bed which wobbled as to demonstrate his point. “But as you can tell they are not quite enough.” He went to pick up the discarded box before looking back to Roman. “Which is why your gift is...”  
Virgil caught himself mid-sentence, was he really about to thank the creative side for the gift? His calm slowly wore down as realization hit him.

“You still didn’t tell me WHY you felt guilty. I thought you were about to give me something nasty.” Not a punch this time but a light bump on Romans arm as he sat back down. ”Did you really feel THAT bad about giving me something I already owned? Always have to be number one, eh?”  
He didn’t seem mad, just slightly annoyed with the creative side. Against his better judgement Roman decided to do exactly what he told himself not to do.

“I can’t really explain. I would have to show you” he slowly took Virgils hand ”…Sorry. ‘Just don’t…don’t freak out.’ ” Virgil deadpanned as the quote and over the top enactment happening before him clicked in place with memory.

“You’re not gonna start to singing are you, RO'punzel?”

Roman gave a weak smile before stretching his arms. He grabbed Virgils hand firmer and before they knew it the room was changing around them. Virgil who had initially tried to get away had dropped Romans gift and was now pressing himself towards Roman as his world disappeared around him.

‘Simple; might be key here’ the creative side thought.

Dark floorboards, plain dark purple wallpaper and a dark ceiling that sloped at the far end. One big round window for some added drama and a bundle of small lights speckled the ceiling keeping the room dim but not dark. He stopped the whirl of creativity and let go of Virgil who tumbled away.

“Please don’t freak out!” He repeated keeping up the Rapunzel enactment.

“How? Where did you take us?”

Virgil seemed upset. Maybe Roman should have listened to himself. Stupid creative impulses. What had he done? ‘Change’ upset anxiety and Roman had just taken away his inner sanctuary.

“We’re still…we are still in your room.” Virgil glanced around finding his few pieces of wobbly crooked furniture and fairy lights still present “I’m so sorry Virgil I think I can change it back. Maybe..”

Virgil jumped back taking both Roman hands and holding them down forcefully.

“Don’t you dare!”

Roman was too stunned to say anything. This was new and unexpected. He maintained eye contact as his brain reset. He blinked and Virgil let him go, turning around.  
“I mean, its fine or whatever.” He seemed in battle with himself. “…How does it work exactly?”

“Oh… well I’m not sure… I’ve done it for Patton and Logan.. MANY years ago!” He added quickly “that’s why I was felling…guilty… Seeing your sanctum in such a disorienting state. No offence! It was so long since I did it last. Before we were… I had forgotten it was something I could.. Nei, SHOULD have done for you.”

“Oh…OH!. But no, wait. This stays permanent? How does that work? Does this affect Thomas? You putting…” He desperately gestured to all of Roman. ”Creativity; into all of Thomas inner rooms?”

“Yeah, well Calculator was complaining about that too. But he gave in to the fact that if that were the case a little creative thinking would only help solve Thomas’s problems.”

As Roman summarized that out loud for the first time ever, he realized it had been a compliment from the Logical side.

“L said that?” Virgil answered skeptically.

“well, the nerd used different words I suppose… but the main point still stands.” Roman fired back.

Virgil looked around his room. Reaching up where the ceiling slanted down towards the desk. He looked nervous but not uncomfortable.

“I can try change it back if…”

“Petrol.” Virgil interrupted.

“What?” Roman stated in surprise not expecting the other side to meet him halfway.

“Petrol, the color!... This one is too dark. And the purple is just.. a bit much…”

“What are things I thought I would never hear Virgil say for 200” Roman shouted excitedly.

“Jeopardy? Really? Outdated much?”

“Insults are really not your strong suit Nightmare before Btchmas. Now tell me what else you want me to transform.” With a wave of his hands the walls turned a pleasant deep shade of blue.

Virgil eyed Roman casually. The creative side had never looked so comfortable with him in the same room. Now all of Roman was beaming positive energy at the thought of getting to help Virgil. It was a gamble. Roman could take free reigns and just make his room fluffy and pink permanently if he wanted to. The room became lighter and for the thousand time today, Virgil decided not to follow his anxiety. He decided to trust Roman. He went over and picked up Romans gift from the floor. At closer inspection in the now much brighter room he noticed the fairy lights were formed to look like tiny lightning bolts. It made Virgils eyes water uncomfortably. Roman still patiently waiting behind his back. He blinked a few times and turned around.

“Why is the ceiling not petrol blue yet Mr Interior Disaster. And you should know I would still want a few purple details. These lights should be hung around that big window to remind me of your big airy ego” Virgil hesitated only for a second to see Romans smile grow impossibly wider. “The window btw, make a ledge wide enough to sit on. Mattress, pillows and whatever for comfort… and you call that a view? There is literally nothing outside. Even Logan wouldn’t argue with the use of the word ‘literally’ here because it’s just… black…Honestly Ro where’s your sense of imagination…”

As Virgil kept ranting he missed Romans fond smile as he accidentally and let the insult free nickname slip once more.

\-----


	4. Chapter 4 - Put all the lovelies together

\-----

“I would say Virgil has been gone for long enough now. There is no change in Thomas but perhaps we should check up on him anyway since he rushed off so suddenly?”  
“You’re taking my advice Lo?” Patton smiled brightly up at Logan.

“Um well” This was out of Logans comfort zone “I do still believe privacy should be respected but since it is Virgil were referring to and he is known for taking things personally and holding onto them it might be in his best interest.” Pattons full focus on him caused him to ramble on. ”For example the video where I proclaimed that I am no defeatist, which was referred to as a fact about myself rather than anything else. He chose to believe it was an insult aimed at him. That comparison struck him much harder than intended. In conclusion; the better option would be to ‘Check up on him’ as you say… Just to be sure.”

“You had me at ‘believe’“

“That.. is.. oddly specific, It was mid-sentence and I had not even made my point then.”  
But Patton was already on his way to the stairs. Logan deflated. Probably another reference he hadn’t caught up on. He sat back, defeated, reaching for his book.

Patton stumbled enough steps backward to be able to bend down and see the logical side through the bars.

“You coming Lo?”

“You?..um. You want me to come with you?”

“Well obviously. I said so before. I like your company. Oh, oh, and bring the cookies!”

\-----

The room kept shifting as Roman kept adding new additions all while humming. Virgil kept throwing demands as talking seemed to keep his panic at bay. Virgil had never imagined having anything nice for himself. This caused his ideas of ‘nice, cool and comforting’ to become a jumbled mix of things and furniture that really didn’t fit together and had to be changed again and again. He would have stopped long ago if it wasn’t for the creative side egging him on.  
“Your wish is my command” Was all Roman would keep informing him, mixed in with both old and new nicknames Panic at the Everywhere, Chemically Imbalanced Romance, My Dark Overlord, Purple Crow, Thunder Cloud, Emo IKEA.

As time went on and creativity grew tired, sillier names replaced the old ones.

“As you wish Butterparsnippcup” Roman giggled 

“That doesn’t even make sen…RO!” Virgil exclaimed as Roman conjured up a pair of pink and yellow curtains to cover a set of comfylooking beanbags and pillows in the far corner.

“Oh sorry” Roman laughed before he changed them into a patched up black, red, petrol and purple heavy drape. “As you wish; a mess befitting no one but you my emotastic geek”

Virgil could not help the playful laugh escaping him as he ran and tackled Roman causing them both to get thrown onto the edge of the bed. A loud creak made them both to pause. There was a moments silence and then Virgils old bed broke at the foot end. They looked at each other in surprise before breaking back into a laugh.

“Is this STILL NOT how you envisioned my first visit to your room Virge?” Roman puffed out between fits of laughter and gasping for air.  
Virgil blushed at the implication. Trying to form a sassy response. When none came to mind he settled for:  
“Are you honestly trying to flirt with me right now?” Virgil cursed inwardly, his disbelief too apparent for the sentence to be considered a joke.  
Still in uncontrolled laugher Roman still managed to form a genuine smile.  
“What did you think all the nicknames were for V.”  
Virgil paused before getting up. Shaking his head at his clearly exhausted friend. Roman had lost his mind.  
“I’m not dealing with you like this.”

Suddenly there was a loud knock on the door followed by:

“Kiddo? Everything ok in there?”  
“You do not have to open Virgil. We just want to know if you are in need of any assistance?”  
“Also, we brought cookies. Lo tell him we brought cookies.”  
“I told you we should not stay here for that long Patton. It is dangerous. Not just for us, but for him and Thomas and…”  
“Not if he lets us in THERE Lo.”  
“That may be correct Patton, however..”

“DONT COME IN. VIRGIL AND I BROKE THE BED!” Roman bellowed causing the banter outside to die abruptly.

“ROMAN” Virgil hissed all while the creative side was now laughing so hard at his own joke no sounds or even air was escaping him. Virgil rolled his eyes at the unhelpful side rolling on his bed.

“Oh.. I see. Um, Patton, perhaps we should probably …come back later”  
“But we just got here..”  
“Roman seems to have things under control. I’ll explain later..”

The laugh finally escaped allowing Roman some air as Virgil threw the door open pulling the two surprised sides inside with a huff.

“Help me with him! Please.”  
Patton, blissfully unaware of how awkward Logan was feeling at the previous implications, skipped over to Roman putting a cookie in his face.  
“I LOVE what you’ve done with the place kiddo.” He gasped “Is that why Roman is here? I totally forgot he could do this. He just has to do my room next. It was soooo long ago…” Patton stopped, looking over Roman more closely “What’s wrong with him?” He finished as Roman grinned taking a bite from the cookie, slowly rolling from side to side on his back on the now half broken bed.

“Creative overload?” Virgil shrugged, realizing it was probably his fault for telling Roman to redo things over and over.  
“Ah, he became too much for himself to bear?” Logan suggested “Well we all knew this day would come. It was really just a matter of time.” He kept the tone of a preacher at a funeral, a preacher who hated his job. “I guess this shall be his final resting place then.”

Virgil could not help to snigger as Roman let out an offended gasp behind the cookie stuck between his teeth which In turn caused him to choke and cough on a few crumbs. Patton patted Romans back before looking worriedly at Virgil. He didn’t say anything but Virge could positively hear the dad character asking him a thousand questions about his anxious son’s wellbeing. He tried to give an honest smile and it took him a moment to realize that he did not even have to ‘try’.  
His friends had come to look for him. Not to force him to talk or to ‘do’ something for them or to ‘stop’ doing something. They had come to see him for the pure reason to try to make him feel better if he so needed…with cookies!

He walked over and hugged Patton before anyone else saw the tears threatening to spill over.

“I’ll tell you everything later. It’s a long story…Thank you!”  
Patton hugged him back his grip tightening.

Logan looked Roman over to rid himself from the feeling of being the odd one out. Even though Roman seemed to be the oddest one in the room at the moment. Logan would never admit that the princelike persona had any grace to begin with, but at the moment there really was no grace at all in the creative side.

“Are you sure you are alright Roman?” Roman was still breathing and smiling big but had stopped his laughing fit.

“Well of course” Virgil released Patton from the hug slightly worried about the tone of voice the creative side was using. Roman stood, made a graceful wave over his head. As he did so the crooked broken bed disappeared and was replaced by a big corner couch. Deep dark purple pillows and a carved golden frame. He immediately fell back towards it apparently not realizing just how far away he was from it. Luckily both Virge and Logan were there to catch him and set him down in the corner. Virgil sat heavily by the edge as Roman put all his weight towards the anxious mans chest.

“Roman?” Patton gasped.  
“He is just exhausted” Logan simply explained as he settled Romans legs up on the couch while eyeing the room. “Pat mentioned your sanctum would be empty so I can assume he did all of this today?” Virgil only nodded looking down at the friend in his lap. “And am I correct to guess it was not planned?” Virgil nodded again as Patton sat down by Romans feet. “Aha, yes. A creative project CAN be a source of energy. Burst of imagination however are a different thing and can be especially straining. With a project you have an end goal to work towards and when you reach perfection you will know it. If the project it goes astray you still have the premade plan for the goal to work towards. Unplanned bursts however…” Logan paused unsure if his observations and explanation was even necessary.

Virgil was stroking a few hairs of Romans forehead before feeling for a fever with the back of his hand. Both Virgil and Patton looked up at Logan expectantly the moment he stopped talking.

“Um, unplanned bursts…” Logan repeated as he wanted to pic his words carefully now that he realized he had the two sides undivided attention. He did not want to risk accidentally upsetting Virgil by somehow implying this was his fault. “Since every creation is up for… (judgement) examination there is a (risk of rejection) possibility for experimentation. And with no clear plan the things.. might not..match other things and therefore might have to be reexamined.”  
Logan maintained focus on Virgil and Roman as to not imply that any specific creation, and therefore Virgil, was guilty of Romans condition. Before the anxious side could drift away he added:  
“It is not new. He exhausts himself all the time for Thomas videos and performances. This is however is the first time I have seen him exhausted in THIS way.”  
“What do you mean?” I must just be the lighting but Logan imagined he saw the eyeshadow grow darker around the traits eyes.  
“What I mean is that after a BIG creative process. When he has exerted himself like this he is usually either unbearably full of pride and ego or utterly disappointed in everything and everyone. This is the first time I have seen him… well, like this!” Roman just giggled back as a response.  
Logan looked unsure, Virgil looked puzzled, Patton was trying to reach a cookie that was too far out of his reach now that he had planted Romans legs over his lap.

Virgil kept looking over his room, eyes lingering on shelves, floorboards and carpets thinking back on those he had asked Roman to change more than once. He looked back down at Romans now resting face as Logan pushed the cookies further away from Pattons reach. If Virgil had been more himself he would have noticed and probably questioned the playful teasing ‘fake angry’ vs ‘happy’ expressions being exchanged between Pat and the logical side. But instead he casually asked:

“will he be…ok, or whatever?” Logan looked over to him. The blank expression made Virgil toss his cool persona out the window. This was all his fault. “Can’t we do anything?”

“well” Logan started ”It is past eleven PM. He needs rest… And yes; he will recover.” He added quickly after reading Virgils expression.

“But what if…”  
“Ah ah ah kiddo. We talked about this. No ‘what if’s’!”  
“BUT what i…”  
“I have to agree with Patton. It is good for you to be cautious. This time however it is normal. It has happened before, and probably will again. He is the creative side and he can, just as any of us on any day, run dry.. so to speak. With nothing left to give, he just needs time to…recharge”

“Pardon ME. I am not a battery.” Came a very low and grumbling exclamation from Virgils lap and with the snap of his fingers a television appeared with the Netflix logo shining brightly back at the group. “I am as just great any of you. Just like Vibrant Electricity here.” He continued to mumble as he snuggled his face into Virgils chest much to Virgils distress. His hands hovering above Roman unsure if he should smack the other side or not.

Virgil expected them all to shout the creative sides name in unison. Cursing the stupidity of the side for creating yet another thing. But instead Logan grabbed the cookies and finally placed them behind Romans knees just within both Pattons and Virgils reach. He blinked in confusion as the Logical side sat down at the opposite end next to Patton and flipped through some series before landing on Dirk Gentlys Holistic Detective Agency and choosing episode 1 before anyone could object.

Patton just hummed contently grabbing a cookie (before squirming as a bloody room appeared but slowly settled again after a kitten walked into view). Virgil looked down as Roman snuggled impossibly closer. Was this really ok? How could this be ok? Stunned Virgil looked for an escape but only found that the more he looked around, the more he never wanted to leave. No more empty spaces or gut wrenching voids. No more hiding out in the corner of the mind where nightmares would seep through and the darksides came for unwanted visits. He gazed out the big round window. With a snap of his fingers all the lamps but the fairy lights faded. The outside looked impossibly dreamy with whirls of rainbow autumn leaves blowing past in slow calming waves. Bright stars and a small slice of moon illuminated the ground as small drips of water started to prickle on the window.

Virgil breathed out. Was this really real? He looked back towards his friends on the couch where Logan had suddenly found himself in a similar position as Virgil with Patton inching closer for warmth. A smile grew on Virgil without his permission and he ducked in under the cover of his hoodie to hide himself.

“Vibrant Electricity” Roman mumbled silently up at him through closed eyes.  
Virgil could only huff at the major ego of his friend. But felt content knowing that the creative side would not be changed by the event of this night but continue to be his annoying self. Virgil allowed himself to casually let his hand fall to the side of Romans neck where he let his thumb do microscopicall motions over the exposed skin. Every once in a while Roman would shiver and mumble the name again.  
“V..Vibrant.. Electricity”  
If Roman had been more awake he would have known that none of the sides had picked up that he had in fact not called himself Vibrant Electricity but rather compared himself to Virgil who the new nickname now and forever belonged to. Enclosed in Romans hands he lovingly tended a small plush in golden fabric shaped like an oil lamp. His thumb unconsciously ran back and forth over a small piece of white patchwork on the side, shaped like a lightning bolt.

\-----

< 3 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was the last chapter.  
> I just decided to post everything straight away... that might not be how you are supposed to do things..? Also not sure how tags work... so uh... might just post it over on fanfiction.net too.
> 
> But not today, I am super sleepy so I really really hope this story brought you some joy.  
> hugs and boops all around. < 3  
> ;)


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